I like horses. So what? That doesn’t make me a horse girl. I like to wear my hair in a long braid and enjoy boot cut jeans. Sue me. And you know what? It’s my choice to walk on all fours — it’s faster and more economical. Who cares if I neigh from time to time — we’ve all done it. I’m sick of all the hate I get simply choosing to wear a saddle and a bit on occasion. I’ve seen … [Read more...] about Area woman mistakenly identified as horse girl
Op-eds
I wish porn would play a little more “hard to get”
Well, yet another day in paradise (isolation in my childhood bedroom)! Time for my only recurring appointment that I’ve managed to have in quarantine ... my 3:30 p.m. masturbating sesh. I do all of the hits: reaching across the bed for my vibrator, opening up Safari and uselessly pressing “Private Browsing Mode.” A mode I can only assume Apple includes just to get us to shut … [Read more...] about I wish porn would play a little more “hard to get”
OK so that’s what the Safdie brothers look like
My (fictional) boyfriend is very … alternative. For example, if I want him to pay attention to me, I have to say the magic word: “Can you imagine if a man said that to a woman?” He’s obsessed with weed, speaking over others, and making me feel guilty for shopping on Amazon sometimes. I don’t know how I got so lucky! As you might have imagined, he was really into “Uncut Gems” … [Read more...] about OK so that’s what the Safdie brothers look like
Why I gave my moms cooking 3 out of 5 stars on Yelp
I’m not asking for much here. I’m home from university and all I’ve requested is that 2-3 times a day, I receive a home-cooked meal or maybe just a little love and appreciation. My mother thinks otherwise. First of all, her presentation is weak. When I came down for dinner just the other night, the lasagna was carelessly slapped in the middle of the same chipped china … [Read more...] about Why I gave my moms cooking 3 out of 5 stars on Yelp
Why your decision to bake bread at home pisses me off
Okay, so you spent your whole weekend growing yeast and collecting dough from the dough bushes you grew on your porch or wherever the fuck that comes from, all for some measly, seedy loaf? Bonkers, I say. Why the hell would you go to all that trouble when you can simply get bread at a supermarket? Ever been to one? It even comes in cool shapes like circles. But this bread is … [Read more...] about Why your decision to bake bread at home pisses me off