AUSTIN—Therapists in the U.S. are going out of business left and right because of a sudden surge in mental health geniuses and experts across social media platforms. Some girl on twitter made a thread on “low-key signs you have anxiety” and now self diagnosing is so much easier. Clicking a pen really fast? Damn, guess you have ADHD. Bummer. Now that mental health information and diagnoses are available from hot 16-year old girls on Twitter and Instagram, there’s no longer a need for educated medical opinions. Some of the best advice I received from social media was to drop my therapist (who is covered by my parent’s insurance). It honestly makes sense, because my therapist is a woman named Kathy who used to be an army medic and wouldn’t know a vibe check from a vitals check. This is a huuuuuuge relief for me. I never even liked going to therapy because Kathy doesn’t think I’m funny or like it when I called my panic attack in a gym locker room a god-sent vibe check. Farewell, Kathy. I’ve got it from here.