Shaquille O’Neal Books Himself Another Big O’Deal

ATLANTA, GA—The advertising community let out a celebratory squeal this week when former NBA player Shaquille O’Neal booked himself another big ole deal. “My contract with Icy Hot has run out, it looks like I’m the new spokesperson for the prevention of gout,” announced Shaq as he sipped on a milky stout. “My NBA money is running dry, so I’m giving this whole over-saturated spokesperson thing a try.” At press time, Shaq was spotted prepping for a commercial by giving his big ole head a glossy shine.
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