Local Man Insists Wearing Camouflage Increases Chances of Catching Fish

GALVESTON, TX—After returning from a long day out at sea with three fine bass fish, local fisherman John Sims once again credited the success to his camouflage attire. “Sure, the fish can’t physically see what I wear, but we’re dealing with highly intelligent animals. They feel my attire, sense it in their delicate bones, and utterly confused, inevitably fall into my trap,” described Sims as he soothed the dead fish with soft coo’s. “When I started fishing in high school, I was ridiculed by friends for wearing clothing inspired by forest undergrowth out on the Galveston Bay. Those people have now all become lawyers and doctors. But I remain out at sea, reeling in fishies well into my 50’s.” Sims’s wife Alice was unable to comment as she works overtime to support their three kids in college.


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