Area man says “beep” anytime he presses kitchen appliance button

DALLAS—Patrick Wellington has recently gained local infamy for what is being called “the dumbest social experiment of all time” after spending three years of saying “beep” whenever he presses any kitchen appliance button. “I've received plenty of backlash, but every great artist has stirred controversy—that’s what keeps me going,” said Wellington, who has been a freelance artist since he was fired from his job at Chick-Fil-A for customer disturbance. “My dream is to be invited to perform Beeping in a gallery, and then maybe make a documentary about the hardships I’ve faced for my art.” At press time, Wellington was reportedly spotted making people feel uncomfortable in the appliances section of Best Buy.
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