Dog mayor suspected of dog corruption

PARIS, TX—Unnamed officials have confirmed that the famed dog-mayor of Paris, Texas, Ollie Roberts IV, is under criminal investigation for dog corruption. “There have been rumors of food-under-the-table deals for years,” said Beatrice von Whiskers, the assistant district attorney in charge of the investigations. “We do not yet know the full extent of his canine misconduct, but there is strong evidence that he has done dog things very corruptly. The people deserve to know that their elected leader has not been a good boy.” At press time, Mayor Roberts was caught digging a hole in the yard to hide official documents.